Tuesday, March 29, 2016

Tonight we tart in hell!

Not sure what prompted me to actually look at the back of a Pop Tart box before tossing it into the recycle bin. But when I did, this is what I found:

The whole back of the box was decorated with odd tart-related images, of which this was the most bizarre.

Help me out here. Pop Tarts are being threatened with Toaster invasion, and the King of the Pop Tarts is deliberately killing the Toaster emissary? Who even gets this joke? Nobody under the age of ten was even born when 300 came out (and it was released with an R rating, so likely audience members skew even older).

Clearly Pop Tarts are being marketed to someone besides kids these days. With that in mind, here are some suggestions for other famous movie moments that could be tarted up a bit:
  • Your mother eats tarts in hell.
  • Say hello to my little tart!
  • Forget it, Jake. It’s Chinatart.
  • I ate his liver with Pop Tarts and a nice Chianti.
  • I know it was you, Fredo. You broke my tart.
Or at the very least perhaps this could breathe new life into an immortal classic of the silver screen:

For what it's worth, the tag line at the top of the poster is pure coincidence.

Or is it?