Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Asylum Architectural Digest

It’s been awhile since the 8sails staff watched Frankenstein and the Monster From Hell, and a question raised by the picture is still nagging at me: why would anyone build an insane asylum with a secret room in it?

I can practically hear the conversation between the asylum director-to-be and the architect.

Director:  I’ve examined the plans, and everything looks good. I just have one question.

Architect: Yes?

Director: This room here, what is that?

Architect: That’s the secret room. See, we put in a complex spring mechanism in the wall, and it opens a hidden door from this room here.

Director: I see. And why exactly do we need a secret room?

Architect: Eventually all insane asylums end up with a mad scientist either as a patient or a member of the staff. And inevitably the guy is going to start doing crazy experiments on the patients. For that kind of work you really need a secret room.

Director: I guess I just thought this was going to be a day room for the low-risk patients.

Architect: Do you want a mad scientist to start cutting up bodies and stitching their parts together in the middle of a day room for low-risk patients?

Director: Well, no. I guess not.

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